Hey, How is Your Day Going?

Careful how you answer that question.  It was posed to me today, unexpectedly, and within minutes…my response, changed….Not really. (If you easily offended, or grossed out…easy does it in this post)

The Setup

For those of you who do not know me, I am someone that you will very rarely see without a nice cold Diet Coke in my hands (you think Coca-Cola Bottling will gimme some money for that plug?).  Today was no exception.  

I was on my way back to the office from a clients job site and had to make my stop to get my drink.  It’s a 40 minute drive, and there is no way I could make it back without stopping for a soda, and since I had already had one on the trip down, I should probably go ahead while I am at the gas station and get rid of the one that I had earlier (uh hem…use the restroom…).  

I pull into the parking lot of the station that I normally purchase my soda’s from and proceed just like it was any ordinary day.  Little did I know that my exit from the building would be so much more…different.

“Hello”, the clerk behind the counter stated as I approached the register with my refreshing beverage.

“Hello!”, I say. All chipper, kind, on the up and up.  You know, just feeling good.

“Hey.  How is your day going?”, she asked.

The Conversation That No One Hears

An awkward, but brief silence followed as the wheels in my mind start churning.  Then the following conversation, though brief, takes place in my head.

“Why is she asking you this?“, my mind pondered.  

“I don’t know!“, I responded

“You think she’s crazy!?“, said the mind.

“She doesn’t appear to be.” I responded.  “She’s just being nice. We should do the same.  I am having a good day, she seems to be having a good day.  Let’s converse!”

“I don’t know.“, my mind said in that questionable voice.

“Well,” I proceeded to respond to the clerk.  “It is Monday.  But I am alive, I am breathing, and I couldn’t be better!”, I stated.  Very confident in my answer.  Felt really good to.

“It sure is a pretty day”, she said.  

And of course I agreed, “Yes, yes it is.”

And it is.  It’s sunny, a bit chilly, but as far as pretty days go, It may not get any better than this day.  It can only get worse. (Dum…dum..dummmm).

The Plot Thickens and Takes a Turn

“I’m going to leave my soda on the counter here while I use your restroom, if that’s ok”, I said.

“That’ll be just fine”, the clerk responded, and I was on my way to the restroom.

“See I told ya it would be ok“, I resumed the conversation with brainiac. 

“Yeah. You got me there“, it seemed to say

So this conversation is going on while I’m walking the short distance to the restroom.  Thinking to myself how I should somehow work this into a post.  How nice the lady was.  How nice it felt, to feel good enough to have a conversation, though simple as it was, with a stranger just doing her job and happy to be doing it.

See, the alcoholic in me still had to question why she was being so nice.  My old self would not have been so chipper and full of joy.  I would have assumed she needed something, or thought I was up to no good.  Not a very happy person was I.  It’s a very terrible life to live, and one that I’m glad to have left behind.  I wouldn’t change anything about it, but I definitely don’t want to go back to it.

Me and my thoughts reach the restroom door.  Almost whistling Dixie (figure of speech, sorry) in my head, I feel so good. 

I turn the nob. It’s not locked. I proceed to open the door.

(Slow motion scene ahead)

Slowly the door opens.  Still in my thoughts.  

(Slow down the audio in your head for the next scene)

The door is an 1/8th of the way open. 

“Theerrreeeessss sooommmmeeeeeooonnneee…”

The door is 1/4th of the way open, and I start to see a figure.

“iiiiinnnnn hhhhh….”

The door is completely open now and I’m starting to go in, but there is this figure that I’m not expecting to see.

“eeerrrrrrreeeee..!!!!”

(resume normal audio speed)

“OH MY GOODNESS!!!!“, my brain yells.  “WHAT IS THAT!!!!!”

“I DUNNO!!!“, I responded.  

I was scared to death, yet it’s almost like passing the scene of a car accident.  You don’t wanna look, but you just can’t keep from it.  

“IT’S A FAT NAKED GUY!!!!!!“, my brain deduced. (As if fat really really mattered at this point, how heartless of my mind.)

“Sorry!”, I exclaimed and shut slammed the door.  Standing there in silence.  Facing the door in confusion. Not knowing what to do next.

“That was a guy changing clothes, in the bathroom, right there!” I let my brain in on the secret.

“You think!!!” , it exclaimed.

“What do we do now?“, I asked. “Do we stay and wait for him to come out and then use the restroom, or make a run for it?”

“Run! Run like the wind!” brain exclaimed, and I concurred.  

I ran to the counter, picked up my soda, ran to the van, slammed my door shut and took my first breath since all of this started.  Staring out the windshield, soda in hand.  Everything flashing before my eyes.

“I’m alive….ALIVE!!“, we said.

As I was driving back, I had almost forgot how nice the woman was.  How wonderful a day I was having.  How chipper things were.  

So, “How is my day going?”, you ask.  It’s going great!!  Lunch was a little ruined, but it’s a great day to be alive non the less.

 

Hey! How is your day going?

SC