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It’s Scary…It’s Scary

It was bound to happen, eventually.  Something was going to happen, and I was going to take it.  

The Warnings

While I was at Cumberland Heights, the counselors told us on several occasions to watch what medicines we take in the future because some could potentially cause a relapse in some alcoholics.  There is a big long list of things that are OK, things that are borderline, and things to avoid.  Always mindful of this when I have a doctor visit.

The Dilemma

Today, I have done something to my foot.  Can’t tell you what I did.  The only thing that I can come up with is, I sat on it.  Yeah,  I sat on my foot. (Go ahead, laugh, go with the fat jokes, it’s OK I’m already used to it. FYI, I only weigh 185 and I’m 5’10”, so I’m not terribly overweight) 

Anyway, when I left the office at 4:30, my foot was a bit sore.  Not unbearable, just really sore.  By the time I had gotten home and in the house at 4:45, I could barely walk and the pain was borderline unbearable.  It was a bit swollen on the bottom, but it didn’t look all that bad really.  Not as bad as it felt.  As the night progressed though, I had to go to the ER.  After a couple of hours there, nothing broke, couldn’t find anything wrong, yet I still could not walk on it.  

Well, the nurse said they were going to give me a Loritab.  Let me repeat, the nurse told a recovering alcoholic that he was soon going to be ingesting a Loritab.  I had already told the Dr. and the Nurse that I was a recovering alcoholic, still got a Loritab.  

The Fear

As I write this, I am about as scared as I have been since February 2008.  I am hoping that my worry is so strong that nothing bad will come of this, but still, it scares me. (I feel pretty good, I’ve never been scared and felt this good I don’t think. That’s probably one of those bad things I should be on guard against, and I am.) You see, life has been going so good for me over the last 7 months or so.  The reason that I am scared is because I don’t want anything to cause me to go back to that miserable life that I had.

The Relief

I’m not going this alone though.  I have already spoken with several people about my concerns, and they know the concern…they won’t let anything happen.  Most importantly though, I’m letting God in on my side this time.  Everything is going to be OK.


Let me help you help yourself!


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